Bond’s future: How 007 should be kitted out next
By The Prodigal Fool, published on 7 August 2010
When Pierce Brosnan took over from Timothy Dalton in 1995’s Goldeneye, the trailer’s voiceover reminded us gravely that “When the world is the target, and the threat is real. You can still depend, on one man.” Eh, except you can’t anymore. It seems not even James Bond is a match for the global economic crisis. MGM’s financial woes (it’s apparently 3.7 billion in the red) have put production of the latest installment of one of Hollywood’s most reliably lucrative franchises on hold. Ironic indeed that the studio that so desperately needs the profits that Bond 23 would almost invariably rake in, can’t raise the money to get it made and distributed in the first place. That’s the credit crisis for you folks. And, so far, it’s proving more successful than Blofeld ever was at incapacitating 007.
Entertainment Weekly has Bond on its cover this week. Good news? No, we’re afraid not. Under the banner of “Goodbye Mr Bond”, EW reports:
It will likely be years before 007 returns to the screen, thanks to money troubles at MGM, Bond’s longtime studio, which has been up for sale since November. Even Daniel Craig seems to have moved on, signing up for the lead in a different potential franchise, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. The last time the Bond series was put on this sort of “indefinite” hold was back in the early 1990s, after a series of legal battles (and Timothy Dalton) nearly wrecked the series. It took six years to get it up and running again. And in Hollywood today, six years is an eternity. “No franchise can afford to be away from screens for that long anymore,” says a former MGM exec. “You lose too much momentum. Even for Bond, it could be deadly.”
This is all the more frustrating because the next Bond film was shaping up to be one of the most interesting yet. Sam Mendes had been rumoured to direct and some ambitious preliminary casting ideas had started to surface.
But rather than cry ourselves to sleep on our big Bond-branded silk pillow, we thought we’d turn this into an opportunity: a chance to tell the filmmakers how we’d like to see Bond kitted out on his next mission. So, here goes:
The car
Go back to the novels – or indeed the first film – and you’ll learn that Bond used to drive a Bentley. Well, we’re traditionalists at heart and we’d like to see him in one again. The new Supersports to be precise. We concede, it’s not the most elegant thing to look at – it fact it’s a brute – and it’s a bit rough around the edges. But isn’t that exactly what we’d say of Craig’s Bond? And just like the current iteration of 007, the Supersports is pumped up and packs one hell of a punch (0 to 60 in 3.7 seconds, fast enough to outrun any henchmen). We think the two are a perfect fit.
The wardrobe
Hey, we can’t exactly complain about how Bond has looked of late. Since Brosnan took over in Brioni, 007 has very much looked the part. Craig’s Tom Ford-supplied wardrobe is equally elegant. No doubt about it, Bond looks fantastic at the moment. The days of Moore’s safari suits are mercifully behind us. But, as we just told you, we’re traditionalists at heart and we’d love to see Bond dressed by a British tailor again. Some people have suggested that a modern designer should get a crack at it – think Paul Smith or Ozwald Boateng – but, for our money, there’s only one place Bond should head: Savile Row. And if you’re going to Savile Row, why go any further than number 1? Gieves & Hawkes.
The gadgets
Have you ever noticed how the danger that Bond finds himself in on any particular mission is almost always a direct fit for whatever gadget Q has fitted him out with at the beginning of the film? We’ve often thought that the best gadget Q should hand Bond is a Screwpull, thereby ensuring that the worst that could happen to 007 on his mission is that he finds himself in the presence of an unopened bottle of Mouton Rothschild. That being said, we do so love to see 007 use a lethal gadget or two. So, what about modifying some of Roland Iten’s incredible designs? We first came across the brand at the Prodigal Meetup last month and have been enamoured ever since. Q could easily adapt one of the firm’s buckles to house a grappling gun, the cufflinks already look like they could fire soporific gas on demand. But the killer gadget would surely be the credit card dispenser that actually hides a razor sharp knife – you know, for those brutal hand-to-hand combat situations that Craig seems particularly prone to.
The travel
We know 007 has a penchant for beaches in far-flung lands but we’ve always preferred to see Bond operating in an urban landscape. Somehow it’s more exciting to watch Bond tear up a city with hundreds of onlookers than a quiet piece of countryside. But let’s keep it exotic. We’re thinking Hong Kong. A vibrant, exciting world city that is also the gateway to China – and all the threat and mystery that that could entail. Hey, it did wonders for Bruce Wayne. Bond would, of course, stay at the – still rather oddly colonial – Peninsular. He’d either be ferried in from the airport in one of the hotel’s legendary Rolls-Royces or – better still – arrive by helicopter and land at the heliport on the hotel’s roof. A spot of lunch Mr Bond? Can we recommend BO Innovation in Wanchai?
The watch
We’ve discussed Bond’s love affair with the Rolex Submariner and his frequent infidelities with all sorts of other brands, but if you were around these parts last Monday you’ll have read about the watch that adorned Fleming’s wrist as he was banging out all this fantastic stories: the Rolex Explorer. The current Explorer – though beautifully balanced and aesthetically pure – is just that little bit too small to look right on Daniel Craig’s wrist. So that’s why it’s such great timing that, come Q4 this year, Rolex is going to release the new, bulked-up Explorer. That’s right, just like Craig, the Explorer has been working out and will emerge from the gym measuring a more 007 circa 2011-like 39 mm. What better way to come into the world than on the wrist of the world’s greatest gentlemen spy?
If Bond wanted something British on his wrist, he could do a lot worse than a PXD SS1 from Project X Designs. This is effectively a modern Submariner that has been modified to make it look like the watch that Connery wore in Goldfinger. The most obvious modification is the removal of the crown guards.
So there you have it MGM and EON, we’ve done the hard work for you and kitted out 007 for his next mission. Now all you need to do is raise a few million to actually get the film made. What are you doing wasting your time reading The Prodigal Guide!? Get back on the phone to the bankers!
If you can’t trust a Swiss banker, who can you trust?
Bond’s future: How 007 should be kitted out next
When Pierce Brosnan took over from Timothy Dalton in 1995’s Goldeneye, the trailer’s voiceover reminded us gravely that “When the world is the target, and the threat is real. You can still depend, on one man.” Eh, except you can’t anymore. It seems not even James Bond is a match for the global economic crisis. [...]
15 Responses to “Bond’s future: How 007 should be kitted out next”
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Ian makes some valid points there. The only thing I would like to add is that nobody should wear anything that’s been vandalised by Project X, Bamford or Pro-Hunter.
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I think that’s a very interesting issue you raise about these firms that modify Rolex and other watches. I must admit I don’t really know where I stand. A while back I wrote a disparaging post about Bamford & Sons but I am rather taken with Project X Designs’ PXD SS1. Tricky. Very tricky.
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Your previous assessment of Bamford covers the general subject of “modded” Rolex watches quite well. I fail to see the appeal of a process that removes part of a watch’s functionality (and all of its warranty), adds even more clutter to the dial, and still fails to resemble the object it is imitating by retaining the bezel minute markers, gauche “maxi” dial and ghastly rehaut engraving.
Even if it were to exactly replicate the 6538, what would be the point? It does not offer a single benefit, and has not one but many major drawbacks. I would feel foolish – in the sense of “a fool and his money are soon parted” – wearing this thing.
Of course that’s just my opinion, I could be wrong.
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Sorry, friends, for not weighing in more promptly with my absolute support of non-support for so-called “modified” Rolex watches. “Project” or no.
If you want a Rolex 6538 because you like it or because an actor wore it or because it makes you feel a bit closer to taking over for Daniel Craig should he not outlast the MGM situation, then, for goodness sake, save up your money and buy one.
Vintage Rolex not tough enough or today-enough or expendable enough for your “James Bond lifestyle” fantasy of 2010? Then go for the Rolex 16610 Submariner Date, which just retired but can surely be had close-to-new. Timothy Dalton, regardless of what you thought of him as James Bond (personally, I found him excellent), gave it Double-O status in “Licence to Kill.”
Period. Full stop.
Dell Deaton, author-creator
JamesBondWatches.com
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Ian Skellern
7 August 2010
Should not be vandalised . . . except in the course of adding weapons or gadgets to assist in the removal of lady’s clothing.
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Agreed!
I’m not so sure that a Rolex was an unaffordable luxury in the ’50s and ’60s. In fact, they were a lot closer to being a “tool watch” than a luxury item, as tough, inexpensive digital watches didn’t exist at the time. They certainly didn’t cost more compared to typical incomes than they do today.
For a non-exotic watch, I could see something like Sinn working quite well, as I think they come closest of any manufacturer today to the Rolex functionality and sobriety of yesteryear. They certainly are the best in their class of practical and unpretentious watches. Unfortunately, being in a modern Bond film would completely ruin the brand.
By the way, thank you for the tip on Timothy Everest. I look forward to a visit there on my next trip to London.
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Must admit– I would feel more like Roland Iten mechanical belt buckles, et al were in the right company if Mr. Future Bond is wearing an Urwerk and a Timothy Everest. Thanks for your insights Ian, and remember what Roland himself always says, if Mr. Bond needs assistance in the removal of Lady’s clothing just remember that the diamonds on the top view of the mechanical buckle are for the Gentleman himself and the diamonds on the bottom view are for “Monica”
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A celebration of 007: Bond Week « The Prodigal Guide
8 August 2010
[...] Saturday – Bond’s future: As production of Bond 23 lies in limbo because of MGM’s financial problems, The Prodigal Fool takes the opportunity of offering his suggestions as to how Bond should be kitted out on his next outing. [...]
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Dear Prodigal Guide
if you think about kitting out any other fantastic men in the future, feel free to get in touch for some advice! We love your idea about Savile Row, but one has to be careful with his/her choice. Savile Row needs expertise and insight and for James Bond finding a new outer self it most certainly would mean ‘shaken, not stirred’ in this world famous and wonderful street!
Kind Regards, enjoyed the post!
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A Prodigal August « The Prodigal Guide
6 September 2010
[...] number 5 – Bond’s future: How 007 should be kitted out next – One of our concluding posts during Bond Week was to look forward. In the hope that MGM and its [...]
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From Boy Band to Modern Gentleman Chic « The Prodigal Guide
6 November 2010
[...] Guide today: PurpleEagleKing. We first met the Purple One when she responded to our look at Bond’s future: How Bond should be kitted out. She bent our ear for so long about all of the ideas we’d missed in our article that, rather than [...]
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Great article.
I’m a long time Bond fan (as my moniker might suggest) and I think some of your choices for Bond are excellent.
I look forward to reading more from you.
Dublo.
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Thanks, Dublo. Much appreciated.
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Straight up
6 July 2011
Ladies and Gents…. LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION. Good news, I have all the financial problems solved location wise. All I have to say is SIngapore. Yes, Singapore. It does not get anymore colonial than Raffles (ahh the dark mahogny woods and white linen). Little India on a Sunday night… absolute chaos, temples, people scurring here, there and every where. It actually feels like you are in an Indian city. Then, there is China town, filming could happen during Chinese New year with the parade, dragons, drums and fireworks. Then, of course, Bond needs a little R&R so, that would be Malaysia’s Tioman Island. Then, back to Singapore with a boat chase in the harbour, perhaps a rendezvous with Chinese evils at the casino. Of course, I would like to see Bond in a Jaguar E type, however, please note that this would not be the get away/chase car, that would be the new Eagle Speedster.
Ahh, but there are still problems as I agree with Ian that Bond should lead the way and not have something that can be found fake in a Singapore market stall. So, I will leave the watch to the experts.
We would also have to change Bond’s choice of poison as I cannot imagine him asking for a Singapore Sling. This is a work in progress….
Ian Skellern
7 August 2010
I am sorry Fool but I think you have got it all wrong: your title should have read, “Bond’s past: How the next 007 should be kitted out.”
To my mind, Bond leads, he doesn’t follow fashion or anything else. In Fleming’s day, Rolexes and Aston Martins were exotic dreams, not something that every city banker might have on his wrist or in his garage.
007 should have things that are the absolute best in their class, but the general public has never heard of because they are only known to insiders like Bond.
How many Bond girls today would swoon if they saw a Rolex on Bond’s wrist? They would more likely think Austin Powers than 007! The next Bond should wear something exotic like an URWERK or a Richard Mille.
Gieves & Hawkes? How yawn-inspiringly predictable . . . and how utterly boring for a man like Bond. It should not be traditional tailor that all the world has heard of, but someone a bit edgy and not as well known. Somebody like Timothy Everest.
Let’s help Bond into the future, not lock him to the past.
And who do you think should write/sing the next Bond theme song?