We love the dark, the dirty and the demented. Particularly when it comes to cars.
Perhaps that’s why we wanted to share with you the latest embodiment of all of the above: the Nissan Juke-R concept. In taking a car that many call the Joke, despite its apparent popularity as a small SUV, and mashing it up with the engine and choice parts from the mighty techno-fest that is the GT-R, Nissan have shown that they can make us laugh and shake in equal measure.
Nissan wants more publicity thanks to the Juke? We’re happy to oblige. Thanks to the insane folk of Nissan Europe, the Juke-R literally looks like it has eaten a GT-R and spat out the non-essentials. What was left behind, you ask? Well, how about a 485-horsepower 3.8-litre, twin-turbocharged V6 engine; a tasty six-speed gearbox and all-wheel drive system. Oh, and wider wheelarches were required to make room for the GT-R wheels, suspension and bronzo brakes.
Now, squeezing all this into such a compact frame required a huge effort from a number of suppliers. But the matte black result, with its bulges and punctures, is enough to make us howl and roar. This runty escapee from the Dark Side is actually road legal, although Nissan refuse to create a production run despite the fact they would no doubt shift a couple of hundred in a blink of an eye.
A shorter wheel base than the GT-R apparently ensures it’s more agile than the GT-R, despite weighing some 60kg more than the latter. All the better to belt you from one corner to the next, as you demolish the opposition, no?
In fact, shouldn’t Batman have had this instead of the Tumbler? You read that suggestion here first, folks.
Darth Juke-R: Nissan take the piss and we love them for it
Nissan displayed a profoundly dark and impish sense of humour when they decided to create the Juke-R, previously the most ridiculed modern car on the road. With a GT-R engine in it, no-one would dare laugh in its face now. Would they…?!
Straight-Six had a proper job as a journalist for Dow Jones before lowering himself gently into the warm, forgiving waters of The Guide. He’s our resident fanatic: he relished detailing his BMW M3 for two full days at a time before crashing it at Eau Rouge in the wet; he spends insane amounts on his home-cinema system and has thrown tens of thousands of euros at vintage Rolex sports watches. The little fool simply does not understand the concept of restraint or the meaning of excess. He also – following a legendary "heavy" lunch – once nibbled (yes, like little dogs do) a dear lady friend of ours.
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